Ian Ybarra was the first of many to point me to a new book called Rejuvenile, written by Christopher Noxon. Noxon has written for the New York Times Magazine and worked as a costumed character at Universal Studios. He defines rejuvenile as "People who cultivate tastes and mindsets traditionally associated with those younger than themselves."
Christopher has done quite a bit of research on this burgeoning phenomenon of grown-ups who refuse to "grow-up." I am anxious to get my hands on the book for a closer look. It appears that his writing paints a wide brush of the entire movement, including the extreme fringe of people in need of psychological help — think of people who, as a Wall Street Journal columnist states, "use costumes and stuffed animals in circumstances of startling intimacy."
From what I can tell, Noxon advocates a more moderate incarnation of this type of lifestyle, and holds up role models such as Walt Disney, Steve Jobs, and Albert Einstein — all individuals I have hailed on this blog. I got a chance to see an interview of the author by Bill Maher on Amazon.com. It was fairly adversarial (Bill was actually pretty rough on the guy), and somehow, I found myself agreeing with both of them at different points. Basically, here’s how I come down: I am against the stupid Adultitis-stricken PC patrol who insist on ruining childhood as we know it. And I think every. single. person. could benefit from injecting a little more childlikeness in their life. However, I have continually drawn the line between being "childlike" versus being "childish."
Sasha Cagen, author of Quirkyalone: A Manifesto for Uncompromising Romantics, reviewed Noxon’s book and called it a "a new, liberating redefinition of adulthood, where you can be a responsible grown-up and still maintain a sense of wonder." Now that’s what I’m talking about. If this statement accurately sums up the thrust of Rejuvenile, I think I’ll be in for a real treat.
Technorati Tags: Christopher Noxon, rejuvenile, adultitis, childhood
You’ve been there. You’re in a public place, minding your own business, when you have the sudden urge to parent someone else’s youngster. Now, this urge doesn’t just come out of nowhere. It is always preceded by a heavy dose of non-parenting behavior on the part of that same youngster’s parent, or in some cases parents. This happened all too often in my kindergarten class, when it came to younger siblings who were coming along to ‘help’ pick up their big brother or sister from school.
This also happened to me a couple of weeks ago when Jason and I were shopping for Father’s Day gifts. It was late in the evening, about ten minutes before the store was about to close. As I was trying to make my final decisions, I soon became distracted by two little girls who were literally running around the store. I was expecting to hear a parent put a stop to this. That didn’t happen. In fact, the two girls started giggling louder and louder, which makes sense because they were playing tag. They were probably only three and five-years-old. You can argue that they should’ve known better, especially the five-year-old, but I wasn’t frustrated with them at all. I was frustrated by the parents, both mom and dad, who were shopping. It was as if they didn’t even know who these little girls were. The running and laughing went on for about three to five minutes (seemed like more), when finally the dad came over and told them they were ready to go. He didn’t even notice that they were running. They walked towards the front of the store, where the mom was checking out. I was ready to check out also so I stood behind this family. The parents started talking about something in line, completely ignoring their two little girls, while the girls started hitting each other. It got to a point where I had to literally look away, or I would’ve started disciplining them myself. Maybe I should have.
I read an awesome article in The Onion this weekend. It was called, “Is Anyone On This Bus Interested In Disciplining My Son?” by Maria Sturges. It is a classic example of how things are often funny because of the strong element of truth running through them. It’s written from the voice of the mother, talking about her undisciplined son. This excerpt gives you a taste, but I recommend you read the entire article here. It’s hilarious!
It’s up to one of you to establish a set of boundaries for him.
Over the years, I’ve grown used to his incessant squirming and shouting, so if everyone else would like a calm, quiet ride the rest of the way, then I suggest one of you get up and do something about it.
I should also add that this offer is not restricted solely to other parents. If you have never interacted with a child in your adult life and are not sure whether you possess the instincts or ability to relate to a child, I assure you, you are still vastly more qualified than I am to dole out some tough love.
Yes, tough love it is. Kids sure love boundaries. They also love attention, so if no one is going to give them positive attention, they will soon learn to get the negative attention. No, I am not yet a parent, but I do know that discipline and boundaries are two of the best gifts a child can ever receive.
Today Kim and I concluded the first of two summer cartooning bootcamps here in Madison. Push-ups, pre-dawn jogs, and impossible obstacle courses gave way to writing, drawing, and inking. It sure beats stupid old swimming lessons. We had a great group of kids and I had a blast; they always challenge and inspire me. This photo portrays one of our more serious moments.
Be sure to check out the bootcamp page for more fun photos and a gallery of the kids’ custom made comic strips. Great job, fellow cartoonists!
Technorati Tags: cartooning, cartooning workshops, cartooning bootcamp
Childlike. Childish. There is a difference.
Not everything about kids is worth emulating. For instance, they have a pretty good handle on being childish. (I guess that’s why they call it being "childish," and not "adultish.") Children can be quite compassionate and perceptive to the needs of others, but, left to their own desires, they can also be quite selfish. They have to be instructed in the ways of sharing things like toys and candy and the backseat.
It is true that grown-ups are responsible for developing a less me-centered attitude in kids (and shows like Nanny 911 thrive on those grown-ups who do a terrible job of it). But it’s not like we’re masters at selfless behavior.
In a recent Time magazine article, Harvard psychologist Dan Gilbert asks the question, "Does Fatherhood Make You Happy?" According to an insightful article by Betsy Hart in the Boston Herald, Gilbert writes that psychologists have found that people are less happy when they are interacting with their children than when they are doing a variety of other activities, like eating or shopping.
Like Hart, the first reaction that comes to my mind is, "Gee, do ya think?" And my second thought also echoes Hart when she says, "Whoever said kids are supposed to make parents happy?" She goes on to write:
What makes me really, really happy in the moment is a weekend night when they are asleep and I can sit up late with my jazz music, a cup of hot tea and my favorite newspaper. I mean, that’s transcendent happiness!… And yet I also recognize that one of the very best things about having children is that, in a sense, like a rightly oriented marriage, it calls us away from “self” and toward “other.” And if ever a culture needed exactly that, this one does.
Right on, Betsy. It seems to me that in as much time as we spend here cultivating and extolling the virtues of a more childlike disposition, we should also be spending an equal amount of time striving to be less childish.
Every month, one Club K&J subscriber is drawn as the winner in the Supremely Wonderful & Exciting Loot Lottery. This month’s lucky recipient is Amy Cioni! She wins a bag of magic beans! Congrats, Amy!
Join Club K&J for your chance to win this month’s prize Loot Lottery!
This weekend Jason and I got a chance to see Toad the Wet Sprocket in concert. They are one of the bands that Jason and I listened to all of the time in college and have in our many iTunes playlists. Every song was a “classic.” The concert was awesome! When we got home I was listening to some of my 
favorites on our iPod in bed that night. One song hit me more than the others. It’s called, "I Will Not Take These Things For Granted.” It’s a slower song and well worth the 99 cent download, if you don’t already have it.
The lyrics hit me because of a recent tragic death of a family friend a few days ago. As we went to his wake this afternoon, this song echoed through my mind. There are no guarantees of how long any of us have. It’s so hard to life each day as if it might be our last. This song helps me remember just how important it is. Here are the lyrics…
One part of me just wants to tell you everything
One part just needs the quiet
And if I’m lonely here, I’m lonely here
And on the telephone
You offer reassurance
I will not take these things for granted
How can I hold the part of me that only you can carry
It needs a strength I haven’t found
But if it’s frightening, I’ll bear the cold
And on the telephone
You offer warm asylum
I’m listening
Flowers in the garden
Laughter in the hall
Children in the park
I will not take these things for granted
Anymore
To crawl inside the wire and feel something near me
To feel this accepting
That it is lonely here, but not alone
And on the telephone
You offer visions dancing
I’m listening
Music in the bedroom
Laughter in the hall
Dive into the ocean
Singing by the fire
Running through the forest
And standing in the wind
In rolling canyons
I will not take these things for granted
Sometimes I get suggestions from people that I should add more diversity to my comic strip. Why not introduce new characters with different ethnic backgrounds? Within the context of the strip, I have included people of different races in a few storylines here and there. Perhaps I will develop one of them into a major character some day. But creatively, with the strip being relatively young, I have my hands full developing the characters I already have in place. Charles Schulz, the creator of Peanuts, said that new characters should be added when a strip is starting to become dull and needs a new relationship interjected to help spark some new ideas. I can foresee the need for some new "friends" of Kim and Jason someday, but the strip is just not there yet.
Now I am quite sure that I am missing a big market opportunity, and that I could make a quick buck by inserting some "generic" people of color into the strip. Maybe it would even improve my chances of being syndicated. Not only does that seem to me a bit insincere and short-sighted, I also think Kim & Jason is about something universal that transcends race, religion, and nationalities. I believe people are drawn to the strip and everything else we do because they can relate to the universal aspects that are similar in each of us, just as The Cosby Show was loved because it effectively communicated the common experience of family life, regardless of the race of any of the show’s viewers.
I’d like to share a story from my lawyer friend Carlo, who recently traveled to Washington D.C. to be sworn in before the U.S. Supreme Court. (You may only argue in front of the Supreme Court if you are a member of the Supreme Court Bar.)
My childhood moment started as I entered the Supreme Court. To put the feeling into perspective, think about Jason walking into Metropolis and waiting in a room to meet with Superman, Spiderman, Captain America, and six other superheros at 10 a.m. As I sat in the room, my palms actually started to sweat and my heart started to race. I have not had that feeling in a long time.
At exactly 10 a.m. the clerk stood and spoke those magical words, "Oyez Oyez Oyez all rise for the Chief Justice and Associates Justices of the United States Supreme Court." In slow motion, there they were. I was sitting five feet away from the most powerful body in the world. When I stood and Chief Justice Roberts looked at me and I raised my right hand, I had to use all of my effort to remain professional. I read and hear about these people everyday and for the first time in my life there they were. Oh well, sorry I’m such a geek but I guess we all have our own childhood moments.
We do indeed. This story reminds me of a Chalkboard contribution that was posted many years ago at KimandJason.com. In a topic about foods you associate most with childhood, an individual from India mentioned Rajmah Chawal. She said, "It’s an Indian dish, and it’s simply superb. Over all, most of the kids I know love it and I still beg Mom to make them. Ah…those were the days!!"
Besides having never heard of such a dish, it occurred to me that in reality, it didn’t really matter. ANY food could be substituted in the equation: chicken nuggets, macaroni and cheese, or even Salisbury steak TV dinners. What’s constant are the emotions and memories that come to mind.
This is what makes childhood universal. We come from diverse religious and cultural backgrounds, family structures, and generations. The details may vary, but the experience of childhood — the feelings and emotions, the playfulness, the passion, the curiosity, and the wide-eyed wonder — unites us all.
Whether or not you get excited by being in the presence of the Supreme Court, opening a present that you spent months pining for, or relishing one of Mom’s secret recipes that you haven’t had in years, we all know the feeling. We can all relate.
This entire experience of studying children — and childhood — in order to create the daily comic strips, to speak to people all over the country, and to write halfway intelligently in my books and blog continues to astound me. I am excited by the new things I discover.
Perhaps what fascinates me the most is both the unmistakable universality of childhood, and the breathtaking diversity of the way we experience our "childhood moments."
Technorati Tags: diversity, childhood, comic strips
Prince Charles and a schoolteacher named Diana. The King of Pop and the daughter of the King of Rock ‘N Roll. Liza Minnelli and that weird dude. Next week, KimandJason.com will begin featuring the latest in a long line of infamous weddings. Tropical Tracy and G.I. Jim are getting "officially" hitched, like only two ten-inch plastic pals — don’t call G.I. Jim a doll! — can. Don’t miss any of the memorable moments. The story begins Monday. (You can even get the details sent straight to your e-mail inbox for free!)
