I dug up this quote my brother sent me a long time ago. It is from the television show The Wonder Years, which depicted a gentle, nostalgic look at Baby Boom youth and adolescence.
Growing up happens in a heartbeat.
One day you’re in diapers; the next day you’re gone.
But the memories of childhood stay with you
for the long haul.
I remember a place…a town…a house
like a lot of houses…
A yard like a lot of other yards…
On a street like a lot of other streets.
And the thing is…After all these years,
I still look back…with WONDER.
I consider myself blessed that when I look back on my own childhood, I also look back in wonder. My goal is to live my life in such a way that when I come to the end of it, that same wonder will have weaved it’s way through my entire life story. I don’t want Adultitis to gloss over the wonderful things that life has to offer. These wonderful things are missed when we are moving so fast that we miss the smile from a stranger. They’re missed when we stop dreaming big, stop asking "why?" and stop taking time to just "be." Slow down. Make the most of the time you have with your friends and family. I know, it’s a tired cliche, but the joy and wonder of life is hidden in the little things.
Don’t miss them.
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This post relates to our most recent podcast about immunizing your kids from Adultitis. I link to a Daily Guideposts article written by Mary Engelbreit. Mary is an artist whose warm and charming style is the star of an extremely popular stationery line. In the article, she shares stories about her upbringing, and the ups and downs of "making it" as an artist. One thing that stuck out to me was the variety of advice she received from the "grown-ups" in her life.
Her high school guidance counselor, after hearing that Mary wanted to illustrate children’s books, offered this advice: “You can’t do that. You’ve got to be practical. Get a degree in English so you can teach.”
Mary recalls that after graduation, there were many people "who thought being an artist was too unrealistic for everyday life and often asked, ‘So, Mary, what are you really going to do?’”
Fortunately for Mary, her parents were here biggest supporters. She writes:
Then I thought of my parents, and the faith they had had in me right from the beginning. I remembered when I was nine years old, and hurried home to tell Mom that I had met my first real artist. She was a woman who sometimes baby-sat for us and had her own studio set up in her basement. “Mommy,” I announced, “I need a studio.”
Mom didn’t say, “Honey, we don’t have space for you to have anything like that” (which we didn’t). She merely nodded matter-of-factly as though my request made perfect sense—and emptied our linen closet. Out went the vacuum, mops, and towels, and in went my desk, chair and pen-and-ink set. I sat crammed in there for hours, learning how to draw by copying the illustrations from my mother’s and grandmother’s old-fashioned storybooks and signing my work with my very convenient initials, ME.
From that time on my parents always treated my art as serious business. Bolstered by their support, I continued on even without formal training, telling myself over and over what they had instilled in me: “Of course you can become an artist. Keep working for it. If you can imagine it, you can achieve it. If you can dream it, you can become it.”
What a great gift Mary received from her parents. I, too, have been blessed with a mom and dad who have been extremely supportive. As a parent, it is not always possible to to provide your child with the best of everything (even though you wish you could.) Although being able to afford the best education, the best equipment, and the best opportunities for your child is helpful, these things are not nearly as valuable as believing in your child’s dreams. And not only believing in them, but showing them, through your words and actions, that you believe. The world will dish out more than its fair share of discouragement and "reality checks." But the firm and confident encouragement from a parent can serve as a life preserver when the going gets tough. Those words and those actions mean more than you’ll ever know.
I’ll wrap it up with some more words from Ms. Engelbreit:
Related Posts:When my sons were little and people asked them about their mom, they said, “She colors all day.” Their reply still makes me laugh, because coloring is the kind of activity a lot of adults might think strange. It’s right up there with dreaming. Dreaming, some think, is a waste of time.
Today my studio is only 10 miles from where I was born—from where my parents encouraged a little girl to color away in a closet, to use her imagination and dream her dreams. As far as I’m concerned, dreaming isn’t a pleasant pastime, it’s a responsibility. We all have to do it, to bring a sense of fun and wonder into our daily lives. And to be the best we can become.
What would you do if Amy Grant or anyone, for that matter, showed up in your town and offered to fulfill your one special wish? If you didn’t get a chance to see the first episode of the new show, ‘Three Wishes‘ I strongly urge you to tune in on Friday night. (8 pm Central time, NBC)
It’s a show about hope. Amy and her crew roll into a new town every week and grant the wishes of three people. NBC literally sets up a tent in the middle of town and folks line up to tell their wishes, knowing three will be selected.
I won’t ruin the re-run for you by telling you what the first three wishes were, but let’s just say they all made me cry. By the end of the show, as I was wiping the mascara out of eyes, I realized that hope is something you cannot buy for yourself. It is a gift that is shared from one heart to the next. The amazing thing about this gift is that it somehow inspires you to want to share that same hope with others.
Not surprisingly, many of the wish granters that volunteer for the Make-A-Wish Foundation are parents of children who have received a wish. It’s amazing how contagious this hope stuff is.
It’s humbling to know that we can be used to spread hope and encouragement to others. Where does the hope actually come from?
Jesus looked at them and said, ‘With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.’ -Matthew 19:26
It may seem like it comes from NBC’s sponsors…or Oprah, of course. Yet, in reality, it is shining through the hearts of those sharing their time, talents, and treasures.
Instead of wondering what your one special wish would be, try to think about what wish you could help come true.
What do you bring to the table?
Do your have time on your hands? Count up those hours spent watching tv each week.
Do you have some hidden or even obvious talents that need to be dusted off? It may involve stepping out of the comfort zone revealing these talents to others.
Have you been blessed with some extra zeros in your bank account? I truly believe you can never out-give God.
I wish I may. . . I wish I might. . .help others’ wishes come true tonight.
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The Leo Burnett Company web site is a perfect example of how to create an experience that makes the user "return to childhood." I found myself delighted by the unique and whimsical interface that stands out in a homogenized landscape of very boring "grown-up" web sites.
Children are surprised every day by the unique experiences life provides. As adults, we get caught up in the idea that we’ve seen everything. In a world of ho-hum products and service, there is a big opportunity to be had by the ones that surprise their customers with a fresh perspective.
Related Posts:A reader pointed me to a column by D.L Stewart of the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel. Mr. Stewart eloquently describes the nostalgic details of the first days of school:
Like Christmas Eve and the night before milestone birthdays, the first school day after summer vacation was a special time. It may have been the end of freedom, but it also was the renewal of hope. The promise that this school year would be different from all the ones that came before it. A fresh start.
On the first day after vacation, clothes were unwrinkled and unstained. School bags were filled with fresh supplies: pointless pencils, unrubbed erasers and notebooks that had not yet been doodled upon.
He goes on to say that even though that by the end of the first day of school, "there would be gravy stains on our new shirt, most of our pencils would be broken, our erasers could be lost and our notebooks would be covered with doodles," there had been "at least, one brief, shining moment of hope."
Stewart argues that adulthood offers no such vestige of hope, and that "going back to work would not be a new beginning, we realized. It would merely be a resumption of the same old same old."
I do tend to agree with his closing line, "growing up stinks," but I differ with him in the idea that being grown up dooms us to a life of hopelessness and resignation that we’ve seen and experienced the best life has to offer. Life is about choices. Too many people act like life is a spectator sport, and they have no control in the outcome. Hogwash.
In fact, I believe that the best thing about being grown-up is that we have the ability to actually DO something about the things that dissatisfy us so much about adulthood. If you are unhappy with your current work situation, or a relationship, or anything else, I implore you to DO something about it. Don’t let Adultitis creep in and fool you into believing that this is the best life has to offer. Decide to make the choices that will create the change you wish to see in your life.
Children instinctively know that life is not a spectator sport. They don’t spend their days sitting on the sidelines. They spend every day passionately asking questions, dreaming big, and getting dirty. Live life like that and you may be surprised with the results.
Related Posts:Jason and I are ‘wish granters’ for the Make-A-Wish Foundation of WI. This is such an unbelievable volunteer opportunity. We get to work directly with wish families to help them through the wish process. By definition this job means we get to talk with the wish child about his/her one special wish, sometimes brainstorming wish ideas with the family and we help them fill out the necessary paperwork. In addition, the job allows us the opportunity to humbly walk into someone’s life at a particularly dark time and add a small bit of light and hope. This job has given Jason and I a lot to think about and is forever changing our perspective on life. The MAW staff at the office do all of the hard work scheduling and arranging all of the magic that goes into each child’s wish, and we get to deliver all of the necessary paperwork…often trip itineraries. We are so honored to play a small role in this unbelievable process.
Yesterday I had the chance to help out at a Make-A-Wish fundraiser in town. I saw another volunteer there. She and her son had come by to help for a few hours after his soccer game. Her son seemed to be about 8 or 9 years old. I don’t know this woman very well but it seems like whenever I am volunteering somewhere, she is there, often with her son. I asked her if she had been working on any wishes recently, as she is also a wish granter. She said that she had one not too long ago. She said it was for a child with severe physical problems. Without going into much detail she mentioned that the evening of their meeting she had no one to watch her son, so she asked the wish family if he could come along. She admitted she was a little nervous about how her son would react in this situation. Her face lit up as she told me that by the end of the evening her son was playing games with the wish child and they had a fun time together. He saw right past the physical challenges and found a new friend to play with.
What a gift to give your child! Not only providing him with an opportunity to be exposed to others who are different from him, but also being able to see his own Mom dedicate her time to this type of service. Her unsaid message to him through her participation in this volunteer position is that it is important to share your time and heart with others. This type of gift cannot be received by the spoken word. It must be experienced.
When I was in my pre-school years I would tag along with my Mom once a week, as she delivered meals to shut-in elderly people in our community. It was the ‘Mobile Meal Program,’ through the hospital. At the time I was too small to fully comprehend all that I was experiencing, going from one house to the next with hot trays of food, but years later, it sunk in. What a gift she gave me.
The gift of her example.
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When you are helping a three-year-old in the bathroom, you just never know what will happen. I got a fun story from a friend the other day that I want to share. She has a three year old son, Matt. One recent evening they were in the bathroom together, as he was going ‘pee pee.’ As he was doing his business he pointed down and said ‘Penis, mom.’ She replied, ‘Yup.’ Then he said, ‘Daddy has penis too.’ She replied, ‘Yup. But not Mommy.’ Then Matt said, ‘Buy one, Mommy?’
Makes sense in a three-year-old’s mind. How adorable!
The RodeoClown (aka Ian Tyrrell) offers up a nice review of Escape Adulthood on his blog. My favorite part is that he added a few more of his own tips for escaping adulthood:
The end of each chapter contains a bunch of tips to try, and so, to conclude, I leave a few tips of my own:
- Slide down the bannisters. Nothing is more fun than landing a full-length staircase slide and letting everyone know about it.
- Smile at people. So many people grumping all the time, an unrequested smile can brighten up someone’s whole day.
- Laugh more. There’s plenty to laugh at - try pulling faces at kids. Or adults.
- Name your own constellations. There’s plenty of stars and they can all do with names. The splattered cat, the shopping trolley, the saucepan. One day you’ll have named enough to navigate by these.
You can read the full review here. And I like his take on (awOOOgah, awOOOgah–that’s the controversy alarm, folks) protecting the unborn, especially the part about babies being God’s best invention.
Related Posts:My family assembled this past weekend at my brother’s new apartment here in Madison for my Dad’s 52nd birthday party. We all chipped in for a brand new DVD player. His old one was out of commission because "someone" inadvertently put two DVDs in at once. DVD players don’t like that. When the disgruntled DVD player refused to eject the discs, my Dad decided to take matters into his own hands and disassemble the thing. And as life will teach you, taking something apart is much easier than putting it back together. Thus, the need for the new DVD player.
But I digress.
I was exceptionally surprised by a gesture my parents made shortly after dinner. They said that they had been thinking about my book, which led them to think about the birthday parties of childhood. When a kid has a birthday party and invites his or her friends, they reasoned, usually the guests get some type of party favor. So they decided that in an effort to "return to childhood," they would provide favors for all of their guests. (Originally, the party was supposed to be back home, so they had to lug the bags of goodies with them once plans changed.)
From a rather large cardboard box, my father began pulling out little Darth Vader bags jammed with colorful treasures: gummy candy in the shape of cafeteria food, a Star Wars Pez dispenser, Razzles, and long candy necklaces for the girls and foam disc guns for the boys. Everyone got one–me and Kim, my brothers and their wives, and my two nieces.
And I’ll tell you what: it was one of the funnest (I know, not a word) birthday parties I’ve been to in a long time. The gesture may seem cheesy to an outsider, but it was fun digging into the bags to survey the loot, trading Pez dispensers, and biting into gummy pizzas. It was a little thing, but it really added a lot to the evening. I highly recommend it for your next party, particularly if there aren’t any kids around. People may give you strange looks at first, but it won’t be long before the five-year-old inside them starts puffing excitedly on those cheap–but fun!–paper blowout thingys.
Way to go, Mom and Dad.
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While KimandJason.com is the perfect prescription for a long, boring workday, it’s so expansive that sometimes even I forget what’s on it–and I designed it! Today I rediscovered a little Flash game I made a few years ago. Like those great Colorforms® of yesteryear, this little diversion allows you to dress up Stinky, Kim’s stuffed skunk. It’s pretty simple, and abundantly useless, but it’s also…fun. Check it out when you have a few minutes of company time to kill 
My quest to keep seeing the world through "fresh" eyes continues…I have added a few new photos to my Escape Adulthood photo album, including this view through a champagne glass of my niece working on some art.
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In this podcast, brought to you from Madison, Wisconsin, we discuss 8 ways to immunize your kids from Adultitis. Also, we will share a fun game you can play with practically anyone, and mention a really good Adultitis-curing movie that we missed last time. Plus, we offer you another chance to win yourself an Escape Adulthood book.
Listen now by clicking on the podcast icon below.
To subscribe to the RSS feed of our podcast and automatically receive all new shows, paste this url [http://feeds.feedburner.com/EscapeAdulthood] into a podcast aggregator like iPodder. Or, if you have iTunes, you can click on this little icon to be subscribed automatically:
Show Notes:
• Want to play Hide Pokey? All you need is a little character or trinket – the ideal size is about the size of a domino (the game piece, not the pizza.)
• Check out these interesting studies on the effects of TV watching and child development…
–http://www.metrokc.gov/health/childcare/television.htm
–http://www.zerotothree.org/tips/electronicmedia.html
• …and here’s some activity books with ideas for providing more enriching experiences for your toddler.
• ChangeThis.com – a melting pot of interesting ideas and insights.
• Escape Adulthood Manifesto – free to download, read, and share.
• Check out the new Adulthood Stinks t-shirt, now available!
• Have some old clothes to donate? Visit Goodwill or St. Vinny’s.
• Congrats to Katie Smario, winner of last show’s promo and owner of a brand spankin’ new Escape Adulthood book.
• And be sure to check out Katie’s Adultitis-curing movie recommendation: Office Space.
Show Music: The Same by Terrace
Show Length: 26 minutes, 15 seconds
Feedback: We’d love to hear your thoughts! Add a comment below or e-mail us.
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